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does a man's turn ons say anything about him?
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Iceali
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RE: does a man's turn ons say anything about him?
06-22-2012 5:21 AM
(08-20-2010 1:00 PM)ariadne Wrote: Dudes and chicks are all welcome to answer.
If a guy told you (in whatever scenario you are comfortable with) that he fantasized about slapping a woman in the face while she blew him, would that make you think something in particular about him? If so, what?
That, or anything similar, is not a turn on for me, but my answer is still no.
I don't think it's any different from the common rape fantasy that many women have. Judge a man by his actions and not his sexual fantasies.
If he was ever really violent with a woman and left marks, there's a decent chance he'd be in prison for 15 years. If he's overly-aggressive or insecure, you'd likely see evidence in other areas. But as far as I'm concerned, kinks are kinks. And the less sexually judgemental I've become over the years, the better my sex life has gotten. This doesn't mean that I conform to acting out a woman's violent fantasies, but it does mean that I'm sexier to a woman when she feels like I'm not judging her for her turn-ons. The only exception for me would be if she described in graphic detail sex acts which are highly criminal, such as sex with a child... but that's never happened to me and I don't think it ever will. Now, if he describes a scenario of being a pedophile as a fantasy, then yes, IMO one should be concerned and help him get the help he needs.
With that said, it's possible that the two of you aren't sexually compatable and that given his "fantasies", he is only sexually compatabile with a limited range of consenting women.
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(This post was last modified: 06-22-2012 5:41 AM by Iceali.)
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06-22-2012 5:21 AM
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Pheroman
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RE: does a man's turn ons say anything about him?
06-22-2012 10:21 AM
(08-20-2010 5:06 PM)ariadne Wrote: I should clarify to those who don't know: I move in D/s circles where to some this sort of thing might not make them bat an eyelash. It's the first time I've heard of slapping a woman while she's performing fellatio, though, and my initial reaction wasn't a good one. I just wanted some outside input.
There is a fetish for everything. Nothing surprises me.
Some people just have a cruelty streak (women too!) and enjoy seeing other in pain.
Not sure what that achieves other than a head movement during the process.
Although if she doing great I wouldnt be distracting her muchlol. Maybe pull her hair a little.
Forearm to the throat?
A mildish choke will produce a headrush which is exciting for many, but I dont think thats the ideal way of doing it. That would cause more pain than pleasure.
What does it say about a person?
My experience is that woman into strong kinky shit are people who are always looking for an adrenalin rush, not too big on self control and impulsive in a bad way.
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06-22-2012 10:21 AM
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bored4life
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RE: does a man's turn ons say anything about him?
06-22-2012 10:43 AM
(06-22-2012 10:38 AM)mark-in-dallas Wrote: Personally, I wouldn't even think about slapping or getting violent in any way with someone who had their teeth wrapped around my member! 
Sounds painful enough as it is... I would hope it would be more lip and mouth and a little less teeth
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RE: does a man's turn ons say anything about him?
06-22-2012 9:01 PM
Different strokes for different folks. I never hate on fetishes, God knows I have my own. In the mean time, I would never except that behavior from another person, unless I enjoyed it myself also. "Some of them want to abuse you, some of them want to be abused," sweet dreams.
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06-22-2012 9:01 PM
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